life

Making Moves

~ smrtrainingllc ~ 1 Comment

I am 40-years-old and I’m not sure what I want to be when I grow up. For the last fourteen years, I have worked in residential mortgage: sales, operations, and management (with some dabbling in underwriting). Mortgage is not exactly a childhood dream career. I’ve yet to meet a child whose vision board holds amortization schedules, income calculations, and credit utilization formulas. And yet, it captured my interest for a long time.

Mortgage is a challenging industry. In addition to ensuring you meet all corporate and regulatory practices and laws, you must also meet your clients’ needs. Finances are a stress point for so many people and a home is typically an individual or family’s largest purchase. Layer that with ‘domino deals’ (one sale ensures/is required for the next person’s purchase/sale), home costs and interest rates outpacing many people’s ability to buy, limited inventory, and the ability of the average consumer to comparison shop to the bitter end of a transaction – and it is downright HARD to do a mortgage.

The challenges though have helped make me the calm, capable, problem solver I am today. I believe my value is not in being able to calculate LTV (loan to value) or DTI (debt to income) and instead lies in my ability to quickly assess competing priorities, distill complex problems, recognize and influence the motivations and behaviors of others, and find creative solutions. In the Washington, DC area, so often people equate what they do with who they are. It has never suited me well (although I accept those who connect with that type of identity statement) but deciding to leave mortgage gave me an opportunity to reflect on all of this.

So while I started this musing stating I’m not sure I want to be when I grow up, I have some ideas. I want to be a person who takes on challenges. A person who overcomes nervous excitement to pursue opportunities. A person who makes others feel special, seen, and understood. A person who learns new sports (or instruments or languages or all of the above). A person who takes occasional naps and appreciates beautiful sunsets and vistas. I want to be a person who takes the lessons, skills, and experiences from fourteen years of mortgage into my new job tomorrow morning in a new (to me) industry. A person who excitedly packed western attire and is wearing my cowboy hat on the Amtrak train to DC because her new job has a themed Thursday once a month.

I find writing cathartic. So if you’ve stayed with me so far, thank you for reading. Perhaps something will resonate with you too. If you figure out what you’d like to be when you grow up, I’d love to hear about it!

Kidney Donation (part 5 3/22/2021)

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18 months ago (several years ago actually for initial screening) I embarked on a journey to determine if I was a suitable candidate to donate my kidney to a loved one. I received much support and love (thank you all) but just before surgery it was determined that donation needed to be put on hold for a while.

Over the last few weeks I’ve undergone updated testing again and we are all systems “go”. We’re scheduled for surgery tomorrow morning (Tuesday the 23rd).

I am fortunate to have an incredibly vast support system of people in my life. To ensure people interested in the outcome can get updates easily, I’ve created a website with the help of the non profit Caring Bridge. Dave Isaacs is not only going to take my ass to the hospital at 5am tomorrow but will also post an update once we’re successfully out of surgery.

Update is expected around 11am or noon so log in then to see it I’m doing well or if it’s time to fight over my valuables!

https://www.caringbridge.org/public/shannonrucker

Kidney Donation (part 4)

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At my transplant hospital, there is a pair of adjoining OR rooms blocked out every Tuesday for live kidney transplants. Adjoining rooms is the best option for transplants as it has the lowest amount of time between kidney out and kidney in.

When I arrive they’ll put me to sleep and once I’m under anesthesia, they’ll place compression boots on my feet/legs to minimize the chance of clots, and they’ll give me a catheter. To be perfectly honest – I’m scared of the catheter. I’ve never had one and that is the part of the procedure I am least looking forward to (at least I’ll be unconscious).

Doc will cut me open and they’ll perform the surgery. The technique my surgeon chose is a hand assisted technique (hands remain one of the most advanced tools available). My largest incision will be a vertical cut of 3-4” below my belly button. I will also have a few minor incisions to install instrument ports for the camera and other tools used.

Once my kidney is out, they’ll sew me up, start waking me up, and take me to the recovery room. I’ll need to spend two or three days in the hospital. They’ll remove the catheter while I’m awake. I’m not looking forward to this.

At. All. They’ll make me get up and start walking around the next day. I can go home once I can eat and pee on my own.

They’ve warned me that often this is when the really difficult part begins for donors.

Recipients enter the hospital feeling awful. Their bodies have had nearly poisonous blood circulating for years. They’re generally weak and don’t feel super great. Once they receive a working kidney – they start feeling better immediately (because their blood gets cleaned!).

Conversely: donors are healthy. They enter surgery feeling pretty great. Then they have a major organ cut out. They go from feeling physically good and altruistic to feeling pretty banged up and often the ‘excitement’ disappears.

I’m hopeful my recovery will be smooth. I have a great support network and a LOT to look forward to once I heal. I’m hoping this combination is enough to stave off depression. I know that if I experience it though – it’s normal and my transplant staff will ensure I get the assistance I need.

I’m also REALLY excited that my recipient may start to feel better. I love her very much. I’ve known her my whole life and she wrote a song about me that I still sing on occasion.

I’m also really excited about the ripple effect this may have. A person close to me is now considering live donation. I’ve had several people tell me they are considering platelet donation as a result of my blogs. I’ve also raised a little bit of money for the National Kidney Foundation.

I’m really hoping that this continues. You don’t need to have much to make a big difference and I hope you consider making a meaningful difference in someone’s life.